What Olly, a random stranger at F45 confirmed
Speaking Up is not the same as feeling heard.
AT F45 the other early morning doing my twice a week gym workout, I partnered with a young man Olly to do the circuit. It was fabulous to find someone not so purely in the zone of exercise and doing the heaviest weight, but someone to also have fun with and have quick convo’s with between heavy breathing!
He started the usual chit-chat with “What do you do?” I’ve never been able to answer that particularly well, as lifelong I’ve thrived far less on being know for a professional role and more on how I daily make impact in a more service-humanitarian-undercover-healing type way.
I answered his question with something like this. “I love hanging with women who’ve been through some really hard life challenges, loss and grief to speak up.” I then found myself adding….”and to be heard.” His ears pricked up on the last bit with his response, “Yeah, to be heard.” We both got it in that moment.
This got me thinking about my languaging around Bold Women Speak. As women who’ve been through the fire of womanly loss, grief and life changes, I frequently talk about finding our voice and speaking up for well-needed change. But hey, that outcome of speaking up is not enough. We need listening ears and a landing spot for our voice. And it’s not just that. We want to be impactful, influential and see our envisaged change actually happen. Afterall, we’re change-makers!
What are three examples of wonderful local ladies who are starting their advocacy journey?
Alzheimer and Dementia Care - a bubbly local young woman who excelled in giving quality care to her grandma as she was dying, when she sometimes didn’t see that in her whanau or in the care home. I’m so proud of her for standing up to what was important and having a voice for her elderly relative. She has loads to speak up about, and I’ll help her be heard and initiate important changes.
Motherless Daughters – I’ve been in touch with 2 young women in town who have had the experience of death of their mum while they were teens. Yes, to speaking up and creating content for other teens, but again that needs the uptake – other young teens willing to hear such wisdom that will help them suffer less and live life in less sorrow and suffering.
COVID vaccination deaths – Yes, a topic that brings up extremes of opinions, but I honour a local lady who has stood her ground for her sister who died following her vaccination. Yes, she spoke up against a wall of “no-one wanting to hear”, but she persisted. The death certificate finally confirms it was a post-vaccine death. She was heard. And all in respect for her sister who no longer has a voice.
Thanks Olly while breathing through a bicep curl for helping me add that extra important addition to 3 words. “To be heard.”
I would add the words “and for well-needed change.”
And I look forward to our next class when I hear what Olly would like me to hear!
www.boldwomenspeak.com - pop over and see what we’re up to.
